I really didn't think Bo did any drugs except for smoking pot, drinking coffee, cigarettes, and the an occasional beer. In retrospect, I should have looked closer. Closer into his world -- listened just a little bit longer to him when he talked. Paid attention.........

Because hindsight being 20/20 and all -- Bo gave me a lot of clues. He talked about opiates. He knew about Methadone....even to the extent of lecturing me on the evils of treating Heroin addiction with the stuff. "It hangs out in your body for a long time", he said - this expert son of mine. "That's why withdrawl from methadone is so much harder than heroin."

Please Bo. Dont ever take heroin. It's so dangerous. I don't want you to die.

"I wont Mom." "I swear."

How many moms have heard those words from their children as they wiggle out of babyhood?

"I swear Mom -- really, I'm not stupid."

I can't recall how many times I've said that to my Mom -- except that I'm a girl so it went something like:

***exasperated sigh ***** eye-roll ****** "duh mom. I'm not stupid... I swear to god . (turning to dad) Pleeeeeeese let me go out tonight...."

And how many times I turned around and did that exact stupid thing I said I wouldn't do.


Cut out of school with Debbie Schlissel

Smoked joints before school with Marybeth

Got drunk and screwed a marine superbowl sunday 1986 and got knocked up


There's a big list.


But that's about me. Not Bo. I'm 40. I've got some wear and tear to show for all of the stupid things I've done. I'm alive. Bo isn't.




Life is a risky business.